I’m planning to take my trio to church for the first time tomorrow, and I’m nervous.
I have that annoying introvert’s problem about meeting new people. I’m not a fan of small talk – I usually ramble or mumble or just generally don’t have good nice-to-meet-you communication skills. I’m not engaging. I’m shy. I’m … nervous. Since moving from my hometown in Ohio to North Carolina nine years ago, I’ve successfully avoided being a part of my physical community. I have plenty of local friends, but I run all my errands free of looking over my shoulder for someone I might recognize – bringing forth the small talk.
Sigh. Honestly, my small talk just always looks like I have somewhere better to be, which I know looks terribly rude. Shifty eyes, awkward silences, fidgety hands. It’s totally not at all that I’d rather be anywhere but there, but more that I just can’t come up with what to say on the spot.
This is why, though I hold a degree in journalism, I will never ever be a reporter. Words don’t jump out of my mouth when I say, “Jump!” Well, some do, but never the right words.
So there’s that. I’m nervous that I’ll meet people and be forced to act as a normal member of the community.
I’m crazy. I KNOW THIS.
Then there’s the whole business of leaving Toby, Eleanor and Callista with the children’s ministry during the regular worship service. I think they’ll be fine without an adult the know around. They do have each other, after all.
I do worry that their I-can-knock-you-over-the-head-then-kiss-you-and-it’s-OK play style won’t really mesh well with peers.
Then, will they heed the directions of new authority figures? Will they stay with the group and join in, or will they wander off together or alone? Will they show their most awful toddler tendencies that I’m trying so hard to reign in – the yelling, the hitting, the toy toss that follows a tantrum?
None of these worries are productive. My community avoidance is just silly and selfish. My worry for three 2-year-olds to behave nicely is equal parts foolish and wasteful. They’re kind, helpful, smart, social children. It’s normal for them to have aggressive tendencies and trouble staying on task BECAUSE THEY’RE TWO.
I’m going to ignore every introvert bone in my body and jump in, feet first. Look out, Jesus!
Goodness, June. How did we make it to your middle without a single blog entry?
I’ve been a busy bee.
So far in June, I’ve read GIRL AT SEA by Maureen Johnson, THE MOON AND MORE by Sarah Dessen, ELEANOR AND PARK by Rainbow Rowell, DESTROY ME and UNRAVEL ME – both by Tahereh Mafi. I’m currently working on AMERICAN GODS by Neil Gaiman and GOLDEN by Jessi Kirby. In my ears while doing housework or as I fall asleep is HARRY POTTER AND THE GOBLET OF FIRE by J.K. Rowling.
Toby, Eleanor and Callista are also reading a ton, too. We have a large pile of library books we sit to read together along with all their own books they browse through throughout the day. Checked out from the library currently are: CHICKENS TO THE RESCUE, PIGS TO THE RESCUE and KATIE LOVES THE KITTENS by John Himmelman, POSY by Linda Newbery, HERE WE GO ROUND THE MULBERRY BUSH and FIDDLE-I-FEE by Will Hillenbrand, MONKEY AND ME by Emily Gravett, HONDO & FABIAN and FABIAN ESCAPES by Peter McCarty, HIDE AND SEEK and THE THINGAMABOB by Il Sung Na, CHICKA CHICKA 1-2-3 by Bill Martin, CARS GALORE by Peter Stein and WHAT’S UP DUCK Tad Hills. They’re also watching two DVD volumes of Signing Time and listening to four different Mr Eric and Mr Michael albums.
Are you surprised to learn we’ve signed up for our library’s summer reading program? That’s right, WE. Our children’s librarian convinced me to sign up, too. I had no idea they had one for adults. She told me to sign up because I can log all the time I spend reading to ETC. Little does she know, their mama is a reader, too. Bring on the prizes!
Yesterday’s toddler playground visit was eye-opening.
My babies – my tiny, easy-to-run-into-and-knock-down babies – were the big kids on the playground for the first time.
The playground is normally deserted, and my trio play happily by themselves. Yesterday, a family with one little girl, probably between 18 and 24 months old, made a cautious approach. The little girl was shy. She was unsure of the big equipment. She was intimidated by the three hooligans running amok.
My three hooligans. They wanted so badly to play with this new friend, but I had to explain to them that they’re bigger than she is. She was feeling shy. They needed to play and let her watch for a bit, then maybe she’d join.
And they did. And she did. My big kids showed her the ropes then coaxed high fives from their new friend.
They’re growing up so quickly in so many ways. I couldn’t be more proud.
What do you do when consequences become a game between your triplet toddlers?
Playing together, I hear Eleanor tell Callista, “You’re in Time Out. Go sit on the rug. Deep breath. One, two, three, *inhale, exhale*.”
During a meal, I hear Toby tell Eleanor, “I’m setting the timer. I take your food.” (I’ve had to set a timer often lately and end a meal without them all finishing.) Then Callista joins in and says, “I set the timer. I’m taking food.” Cue the three-way giggles and further declarations of timer-setting and food-taking.
Playing together, I watch Eleanor take a toy from Callista and declare, “You’re not playing nice. This is GONE,” then deposit the toy over the gate into the kitchen.
They know the rule-breaking actions and the appropriate consequences, and they make a freaking game of it with each other, laughing till they’re doubled over and making me laugh, too. I mean, it is funny … when they do it.
But I wonder, while I’m laughing, how effective is my parenting if my three 2-year-olds are laughing about their consequences together?
Because there was much hemming and hawing on my part about reading “Gone Girl,” from the crazy loved it/hated it hype to my wariness at a possible infertility story that rubbed me the wrong way, here’s my review from Goodreads:
