I ran across a blogger’s rant about National Infertility Awareness Week today and just shook my head.
The author, who shall remain unlinked, claims that NIAW is nothing more than a self-serving week to allow infertiles to push their medical advice down unsuspecting victims’ throats.
That’s paraphrasing, of course.
Nay, dear readers. This particular blogger couldn’t be further off the mark.
NIAW exists to encourage people to Join the Movement, just as this year’s theme directs.
It’s not to spread unsolicited medical advice to people who either don’t care or who already know because their doctors have shared such information.
NIAW sets aside a week for us to join together at once and pass along treatment experiences, a glimpse at diagnoses and possible avenues that haven’t yet been explored.
We share our medical knowledge to help our sisters and brothers who are currently fighting infertility. We share our medical experiences to underline the need for further research and discoveries. We share our medical jargon to plant a seed of trivia in the brains of others in hopes that someday, if they or a dear loved one or friend someday start their own infertility journey, they’ll remember us as a source of support – be it direct or indirect.
We share our pain because that’s the human experience. Part of having friends and family is having a support system that helps carry your load. Humans are social animals, and we’re designed to run in packs. We work best when we work together, even if that means having a sad conversation over coffee.
We share our hopes because they’re the same as so many. Hey, Curious, Caring Family Member! I know you think Husband and I will make wonderful parents some day and are super excited to see us in that role. We agree! We aren’t holding you back from an expanding-family experience – one in eight people take longer and need more help than others to grow their family, and guess what. We’re part of that small fraction. Maybe you were once upon a time, too.
We join the movement and we encourage others to do the same because we want to make this path easier for everyone it affects, including the children we work so hard to create.
Our family is one of the lucky ones. We beat infertility but the W only goes in my generation’s column. I can’t predict the fertility of my children once they reach their reproduction years, but I can work now to help their world prepare for the battles they or their peers might face.
Visit Resolve.org for an easy-to-follow explanation of infertility, who it affects and how or to learn more about National Infertility Awareness Week. For a quick rundown of my own infertility journey, check out my About page, for the long story, read my past entries on infertility.
I thank you for sharing. The stories you and the others share mean more than most people can understand <3
xoxoxo
I wonder why people think like this? These kinds of attitudes are why so many of us keep it to ourselves. Really, really sad.
It’s probably one of those self-hate/insecure/jealous jobbies, but it’s ultimately ugly. What’s wrong with gathering for a little support, you know?
I’ll be forever grateful to a friend who shared her infertility story with me as she was living it, even though I was NOT thinking at all about having kids at the time. Lo and behold, when I WAS ready, it was difficult for me too, and we ended up doing a lot of the same tests/treatments that worked for her. I felt much more “prepared” knowing what my options were long before we had to have that chat with my doctor. So yeah, I totally agree that it may be helpful even if it doesn’t seem that way at the time!
I think NIAW is an excellent network, and I encourage everyone who could benefit from it to join. You will participate and learn and benefit from being part of it. Glad you succeeded. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you so much for this excellent post, Jenny! Here’s my favorite part: “Our family is one of the lucky ones. We beat infertility but the W only goes in my generation’s column. I can’t predict the fertility of my children once they reach their reproduction years, but I can work now to help their world prepare for the battles they or their peers might face.” The idea that my daughter might have to fight this battle in the future freaks me out, but that’s why it’s so important for us to speak up about it now. My hope and prayer is that my IVF baby will never need help to have children of her own, but if she does, I sure hope that the interventions will have better outcomes, will be significantly less expensive, and also less invasive. Good for you for speaking up loud and clear about your journey through infertility. I am so glad that your dreams came true. And it’s also so good to see triplets born early who are now thriving. Having seen premies really, really struggle, I always have some anxiety in the back of my mind as we pursue treatments. Blessings on your journey.