I gave birth to triplets. I survived 10 weeks of NICU life with three babies at once. I’ve breastfed three preemies for more than two years. Three things I had no idea how to accomplish, and I somehow did it. I didn’t know what to do, but I knew I needed to do my best despite my fears and doubts, and my best paid off.

I wish I could rewind my life 15 years and learn that lesson at an earlier age. Your best is enough, and it’s worth trying for.

I can’t call myself a Type A or Type B person, but I classically don’t follow through with something unless it’s obvious I’m going to succeed. If I’ve’ struggled, I quit. I wrote it off as my time was better spent on things I did well.

That seems so silly and wasteful now. If I’d only known then, I wonder what else I would have accomplished.

I’m trying to run again, Attempt Who Knows What – something I’ve tried to do since team sports entered extracurriculars in grade school. I never joined a team because I couldn’t run without knee pain. It took years, but I finally spent time in physical therapy and learned ways to work around the pain – stretches, strengthening, proper footwear, etc. Still, the struggling frustrated me to the point of quitting.

I don’t care anymore about struggling. Struggles are nothing more than bumps in the road. I can handle bumps. They’re annoying, and the downright offend me at times, but they’re bumps – not walls.

My knees screamed in protest for nearly a week, from week 2 into week 3 of my Couch to 5K training program (I’m not training for a 5K, per se, but it’s a manageable program that will work me up to a pretty decent distance for regular fitness running). I bought new shoes, I dusted off my old PT exercises, I focused more on stretching, and I realized that requiring ice for my pain doesn’t mean I’m injured – it just means I’m recovering.

With the help of Runtastic Pro and C25K Free on my iPhone, a favorite book on audio and a number of cheerleaders (sometimes it pays to be the fat kid among a group of runner friends), I’m doing this. I’m determined.

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7 Responses to Determined

  1. Pattie says:

    YAY!! you can do it! I still consider myself a fat kid, but running helps me feel less guilty about my eating habits :)

  2. Your best is definitely worth trying for! I’ve been following your exploits, so to speak, on Twitter and you are rocking it! And rolling, by the sound of the hills. If you ever get bored of them, send ’em my way. I need them.

  3. Robbie-Lynn says:

    Hang in there it gets better. Btw you may want to check out natural running or minimalist running. My sore knee improved so much once I changed my running form. :) happy running.

  4. Sara says:

    Shut up! You are not the fat kid. And I’m going to be starting c25k over as soon as I’m allowed, so you will be way ahead of me. You are doing a kick ass job–just listen to your body and back off when you need to. You don’t want the boot–trust me.

  5. Beth Anne says:

    We’re totally going to race together.

  6. lindsey says:

    Awe were you sitting on the bench next to me in PE and I was just too self absorbed to notice? Musta been.

    I have a few of the couch to 5K print outs I think its a great idea. We’ll see if I can get back in the groove in a few weeks here after #3 makes an appearance.

    Good luck!!!

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