I hope I have the courage to tell my children some of my most embarrassing stories.
Some are stories I’ve shared with no one, not my closest friends and not even my husband.
I hope I can tell them about the pain other people can cause, about the scars words you hear or say can leave, and about the feelings we all have – whether we’re on the basketball team, the chess team or on no team at all.
If I can’t bear to disclose the embarrassing details, I hope I can figure out an anonymous spin that’s equally or more effective than the raw truth.
I hope my failed childhood friendships and embarrassing incidents can do more than haunt me. I hope they can save my kids from feeling unnecessary pain – or worse, causing that pain in others.
I have a little girl who is almost 3 and another little girl on the way. I am so scared that they will be teased or bullied or belittled OR be the teaser, the bully, the belittler. I am scared that I won’t be a good enough parent to keep the words from hurting (whether from others or to others). My almost 3 year old has already encountered bullies on the playground and it is hard to deal with.
Like you, I want so much to share my own experiences with my daughters to teach lessons, to make them feel better, to show them the world isn’t ending. But am afraid that I will either teach the wrong lesson, embarrass myself, or make them respect me less.
I wish we could shelter our kids, but know that real life would then be harder for them.
I just hope…
I know you will! You’ve already done that for me! You were the first person I “knew” who was open about their infertility issues (multiples pregnancies, NCIU stays, preemies, etc) and the affect that thoughtless comments have. I will never again tease a long term couple about why they haven’t had any kids. You have introduced me to so many things and through your openness have made me so much more sensitive to other’s experiences. I can only imagine that your influence on ETC will be immensely more!
I also want to be able to tell my daughter things from my life. I hope I can!
Girls, as the mother of a grown daughter I think I can tell u that no matter how much u try to keep all those things from your girls u can’t. The world is always changing. Your children won’t listen or think u really know anything of what they r going through. Tell them your stories, but it won’t keep them from being hurt. The best u can hope for is it keeps them from hurting others. Enjoy them and teach them while they r young. But plan on just being there through their hurts. It will happen.